Let it go

Sometimes we hold on too long, sometimes we let go too soon. Nature do work in mysterious ways. You never really know what you have, or had, until you lose it. When obstacles come your way, it is a guessing game. How finely are you going to cut it? What are your risk margins? How much effort are you going to put in to ensure things work?

I always believe that every decision and every coincidence happens for a specific reason. Every action taken influences another reaction. How are you going to make reasonable and beneficial influences upon others depends on your agenda. No matter what we say or do, there is always an underlying intention that serves as motivation for that particular decision. At least I know of one such decision that paid off, and two friends are more deeply involved with each other after a much one sided love for the past many years.

How are you going to make today's decisions pave a better path to tomorrow's dreams? Instantaneous gratification doesn't seem to appeal all that much now, as I look at the seemingly unbounded future. A quarter of a century into my life, and I haven't much to call my own. This is where I am supposed to be at this very moment, and it is fate that you are reading this post.

The future is limitless only when you accept your present circumstances and actively plan for the later years . Every obstacle and setbacks you face is meant to be, and is an invaluable lesson that is meant only for you.

Generation Y

Yesterday I gained an unexpected audience to this blog, and it got me thinking (because I'm in camp, and there's nothing much to do) about how scarily exposed information posted on the Web is. You never know who is watching, reading our listening. That proves true for real life as well, especially with technology that has shrunk the known world so greatly.

Who do we want to be in the eyes of others? What information do we want to make available to others, and what do we want to keep personal? In the past not too long ago before technology was so widespread, such information was easily controlled. You told people around you what you wanted them to know. You kept your secrets under lock and key in a physical diary that gets hidden (mostly) under your bed, at least until your mum or nosy siblings crack them open and start feeding your embarrassing posts to their friends and your relatives.

In the world today, a photo I post now is instantaneously available to strangers across the globe. A tweet posted on a private account is instantly seen by people and shared to unintended recipients. Thoughts and words get misinterpreted, the intended meaning twisted.

The generation of instant information, has got to learn the meaning of building trust and human relationships, instead of instant gratification and pseudo networks built behind an online avatar. This generation, my generation, has lost the meaning of being gracious and human interaction. With every word and phrase uttered, or posted, being scrutinised by a hundred others, we have lost the right to speak freely and staying honest with one another.

I read an article recently about the mentality of us generation Y babies. It was about how we were raised to believe we are all unique individuals, each worthy of a career and life better than the next person. We are in a selfish era, each of us trying to control the rest, imposing our thoughts upon them, believing our perspective is the only right one. Sounds similar to the religion crusades in the early histories of Man. It's depressing and worrying at the same time. At least the crusades happened with like minded on each sides.

Today's crusades is a free for all. The strong will triumph the weak, and even so, the greed of the individual will never be satisfied. It's always about wanting more, and hoarding as much as possible. Haven't we learnt from history about how such elitist thinking will lead to more severe social problems? The world should be a better place with all our advanced technology and wealth of experiences from previous generations. But instead, we have grown selfish and developed an elitist mindset.

It is a pretty grim and cynical perspective on today's society. But I guess this is an inevitable phase of our history. Hopefully our next generation will be more human than us.

2014

First post of the new year, and I'm not entirely sure about the direction of this post.

My Christmas gift from myself finally arrived through the mail. Finally a decent headphone to satisfy my aural cravings, especially with full surround sound movies in the middle of the night. I must say, the active noise cancellation is fantastic. I'm sitting in a hawker center, with this pair of cans over my ears, and I barely hear the din that's going on around me. The Monster Inspiration ANC really impresses me despite what some of you audiophiles might say.

A couple of new year resolutions to make, because it's the "norm" to make resolutions regardless of whether you are going to fulfil it or not. But this year, it's all about details and specifics, rather than sweeping statements or impossible tasks.

First off, extend my range on the trumpet by a fifth. At least that would enable me to take on most standard repertoire, and play lead for big bands.

Learn jazz. Not just big band playing, but how to really solo properly from a big band setting to small ensembles.

Take at least 3000 photos, of which at least 500 must be of usable quality. I've been dragging my feet along my photography interest for far too long. It's time to pick up the pace and get some standards.

Make at least one grand from bonds, unit trusts, stocks, and forex. Well, you definitely have to start somewhere. And one grand seems like a challenging target to work towards.

Update my wardrobe with more "adult" clothes. Face it, we're no longer kids. Those ripped jeans, hoodies, print tee shirts and fancy sneakers have got to go. Tailored shirts that actually fit, bags that don't scream teen, accessories that suit the setting. Just a couple of items to start with before a complete makeover.

Be more on the ball in the workplace. 2013 was a distracting year, with multiple periods of disappearing from work. I still appear for deployments and all, but the standard that I delivered was in all honesty, not up to par.

Physically, I'll probably need a whole lot more work on cutting down my fat percentage, and building strength. Think more Daniel Craig in James Bond. Quite a long shot, but it'll be nice to finally be able to stroll down the beach topless without the muffin top hanging out. In line with this target, I'm proud to announce that I've slimmed down 5kgs over the past two months! And I'm currently wearing a pair of shorts that I haven't been able to fit into for the longest time ever. There's still a little muffin hanging about though.

I recently tweeted that this year, I want to love less, trust less, care less and draw clearer lines to those who don't care. To clarify myself, I'm saying that I'll only put in the effort for those who deserves it, and not to people who just don't bother. The past couple of years saw too many betrayals by people that I used to care about, with the most recent being a couple of days back. It's time to be a little selfish, and not offer myself to the vultures in society. As always, doors are left open for any chance of reconciliation, but the odds that they'll come around are slim.

To the brothers and sisters that have been standing by me, I'll do my best to treat you well. But do keep me in line when I start to stray.